craigslist is AWESOME! ----- PART II

This is how I thought the transaction would go:

Mr. Never Grouchy would knock on my door Saturday morning sometime between 10:00am and 10:30am, hand me ten dollars, and the beautiful pillows would be his.

This is how the transaction went (and I did not make this up):

1. The phone rang at 9:15am. It was Mr. Never Grouchy telling me that he was "running on time."

2. There was a knock at the door at 9:57am. I live in a secure building so someone let him in. I guess I wasn't meeting him at the elevator.

3. I opened the door to find Mr. Never Grouchy (let’s just call him "MNG" to save me from extra typing) in a trench coat, wearing a felt dress hat, and carrying the biggest duffle bag I had ever seen.

4. MNG immediately commented how perfect the pillows were and that they matched the ones he had. This is when I thought I’d get the ten dollar bill. He then asked if I was a "MIT person" (since I was wearing my MIT sweatshirt). I mumbled that I worked there and he said he was a "Harvard person" and that he lived halfway between the two.

5. I reminded MNG that the pillows were ten dollars.

6. MNG pulled out his wallet (well it was like a leather coin purse). He had four crispy twenty dollar bills. He asked if I had change. I told him I only had a five dollar bill. He reached down and unzipped the duffle bag and said something like, "Sometimes when I deliver things to people they are interested in buying things I have and he – AND I’M NOT EVEN KIDDING – took an IRON out of the bag and asked if I wanted to purchase it. I immediately said, "I am not interested in buying anything."

7. He suggested that he give me a twenty dollar bill and I could write him a check for ten dollars. Do I look completely stupid? We discussed where he could get change. I suggested Lexington Center and then he commented that he had seen a Dunkin’ Donuts on the way here. "Ah yes" I said, "the Dunkin’ Donuts is the closest place to get change."

8. MNG left. I wondered if I’d ever see him again. I was hoping I wouldn't. At this point I didn't really need or want the ten bucks.

9. I watched out my window and saw him walking down the sidewalk heading for Dunkin’ Donuts.

10. My phone rang upstairs. I ran up to get it – FULLY KNOWING WHO IT WOULD BE.

11. Yep, it was MNG. "Hi Ellen, it’s Mike. I’m redecorating and wondered if you had anything else you were selling." "No, I’m not selling anything else. My friend gave me those pillows. That’s it," I lied (I had posted 3 other things on craigslist the night I posted the beautiful pillows). Mike said, "Oh, it doesn’t have to be more pillows, it could be anything." Again I told him that I wasn’t selling anything else. And, I told him to buzz when he got back and I would meet him in the lobby.

12. A few minutes later I looked out the window and saw MNG walking back towards my building. I ran for the door, grabbed the pillows, and took the elevator to the lobby.

13. MNG was in the lobby with his back to me calling me on his cellphone.

14. I said, "Hello, here are the pillows."

15. MNG said, as he wadded up a Dunkin’ Donuts bag, "I am one donut fatter." He handed me a crumpled up ten dollar bill, I thanked him, and handed him the beautiful pillows.

Here is the status of the other three items I posted on craiglist:
I dumped the frame at Goodwill.
I sold the shelf to a friend.
I am keeping the fax machine.

Craigslist is not that awesome.